Wes's Guide to Gargoyles: Vendettas

Welcome Back to Gargoyles Everyone!

Today’s episode opens one stormy night in Scotland where a shadowy figure in a trench coat is walking along the side of a cliff in the rain. A police car stops him to see if he needs a ride, but the man, revealing himself to be Wolf of the Pack, attacks the cop with an axe and steals his car. As Wolf drives away in his stolen vehicle, both he, and his axe, start laughing maniacally. A laughing axe… I wish that was the weirdest thing this show has thrown at me. Frankly, compared to half the stuff we saw in the World Tour arc, the axe seems fairly pedestrian. Also, in case it’s not obvious, the axe isn’t just an ordinary axe. It contains the spirit of our old Viking pal, Hakon who in this episode, we learn is actually Wolf’s ancestor. I bet Hakon wasn’t expecting his great-great-great-grandson to be a mutated wolf creature, but I guess beggers can’t be choosers.

Back in New York, we meet Vinnie, some dork who sounds distractingly similar to John Travolta who is currently buying a custom-made bazooka from a Mr. Acme, voiced by the always amazing Jim Cummings. First, we had Coyote emulating the Roadrunner and the Tasmanian Devil back in Cloud Fathers and now we have this guy buying a gun from the guy who presumably also supplies Wile E. Coyote? Was Disney making a play for Warner Bros. in the 90’s and we just didn’t know about it? Ironic given that’s one of the few things that they don't own today. Mr. Acme assures Vinnie that whoever ends up on the receiving end of this baby will end up creamed. Creamed as in beat up or badly hurt not as in… something that would force me to strap an NSFW label on this article. Anywho, Vinnie names his new Bazooka Mr. Carter, because he’s weird like that, and then, as he carries the large weapon that he can barely lift through the crowded city streets, he begins talking to it, because he’s very weird like that. It’s here where we learn that Vinnie has quite a grudge against the Gargoyles. Apparently, Vinnie was the guy who Lexington stole a motorcycle from all the way back in awakening. Vinnie was fine, but as you may recall, that motorcycle ended up exploding. Vinnie told the court what happened, but everyone just assumed he’d been drinking and so he ended up getting his drivers license revoked.

Elsewhere, Hudson and Goliath are out on patrol when they get jumped by Wolf and his spiffy new axe down by the docks. Hudson engages Wolf, but even without the Pack behind him, Wolf is still plenty formidable, if not especially intelligent. While Wolf battles the Gargoyles, Vinnie has caught up with our heroes, elated at finding the big one. We learn here that around the same time Lexington wrecked his bike, Vinnie had been working as a security guard for Cyberbiotics and was stationed aboard the airship. Well, we all know what happened to the ship once Goliath and Demona came aboard and we also know Halcyon Renard is not the forgiving type, and so it’s safe to say Vinnie’s career went down with the ship so to speak. Vinnie’s ready to even the score, but struggles to get it out of the bag, inadvertently hitting reverse on the forklift he was sitting in and ends up falling into the water. Poor guy. Anywho, Wolf and Goliath seem to be equal in strength, but when he and Hudson double team him, he’s taken out of commission. Hakon, embarrassed by his descendant’s pathetic display, decides to take matters into his own hands and possesses Wolf’s body. Now the real fight can begin.

Now that Hakon is in the driver’s seet, Wolf has plenty of new tricks up his sleeve, including flight, enhanced strength and temporary incorporeality. Vinnie, having crawled out of the water, watches the fight from a distance and treats us to another flashback. Seems after Renard gave him his walking papers, Vinnie managed to land another security gig at Gen-U-Tech labs. Unlucky for him, he was on parking lot duty the night Sevarius was kidnapped by Goliath back in The Cage. As a result, Vinnie got the boot. Anywho, the fight between the Gargoyles and Wolfman’s Family Reunion makes its way into an abandoned building where Hakon/Wolf has our heroes on the ropes. Things get especially bad when Hakon pulls that mind bending stuff that he and The Captain used on Goliath back in Shadows of the Past on Hudson, causing him to attack Goliath in a blind rage.

While Goliath and Hudson brawl, Wolf appears to not be too happy about some crusty old Viking driving his body around like an exceptionally hairy Volkswagen. Hakon says that Wolf would be a fool to reject Hakon’s supernatural powers. Well, Wolf, indeed being quite a fool, tells Hakon to get out of his body or he throws the axe in the incinerator. See, this far from the cave back in Wyvern, Hakon’s Axe is the one thing tying his spirit to the mortal plane. Hakon reluctantly leaves wolf’s body and agrees that they’ll take out the Gargoyles together on Wolf’s terms.

After Goliath manages to snap Hudson out of it, the two Gargoyles make their stand in a junkyard. Wolf and Hakon attack as Vinnie takes aim at Goliath from a nearby building. Wolf starts bombarding Goliath with old engine blocks. One of those blocks misses by a mile and hits a water tower on Vinnie’s building, washing him into a garbage truck. Meanwhile, Hudson engages Hakon’s floating axe in a duel, leading it into a nearby trash compactor, destroying the axe and presumably sending Hakon to hell. Shortly afterwards, Goliath buries Wolf under a pile of cars. Finally, it’s over… or is it? Vinnie arrives, covered in garbage before a pair of confused and dumbfounded Gargoyles. Vinnie monologues about how he’ll finally have his vengeance, takes aim with Mr. Carter, pulls the trigger, and… Goliath takes a pie to the face. All that buildup, all that talk of vengeance, all for a pie in the face. We followed this character for half the episode, learned intimate details about his life and the myriad of reasons he has to hate the Gargoyles, not to mention all the trouble he likely went through to have a custom made bazooka built for him, and it was all leading up to a gag so silly that Krusty the Clown would roll his eyes at it. That’s so anticlimactic that, it’s actually kind of awesome. And so our episode ends with Vinnie walking away, humming the Gargoyles theme song mind you, leaving a dumbstruck Goliath and Hudson to wonder what just happened and who the hell that was.

This episode is goofy, but I think that’s why I love it. Without the Vinnie stuff, the episode is basically one long fight scene, but it’s a cool one and Wolf and Hakon made for an interesting double threat, Clancy Brown stealing the show as both characters. The addition to Vinnie added a nice bit of levity to the episode and the payoff at the end had me laughing in 1996 and still has me laughing now. All in all, not the best episode, but one I enjoyed nonetheless. After a slew of heavy and intense episodes like Future Tense and The Gathering, it was nice to have a fun little breather like this. Next time, Brooklyn, Lexington and Broadway compete for Angela’s affection in Turf.